Sunday, October 3, 2010

Happy Harvest?

What? Happy Harvest? What is this crap?

I've noticed, on my runs through the neighborhoods around me, that the Halloween decorations are going up. The inflatable displays are starting to get quite sophisticated - moving beyond the ghosts and pumpkins. They are quite fun. But I've also noticed that "Happy Harvest" signs are starting to sprout up.

I haven't really been paying attention, so I went to That Which Will Soon Know All (the unborn little 'g' god known as google) to find out what's up. Ah, I see. It is a Christian alternative to Halloween. As one website put it "many Christians have voiced their concerns that Halloween does not bring glory to Jesus Christ, and have chosen to celebrate the season with different kinds of festivities".

Okay. Fine. As a "heathen", I've got no problem with any kind of silly religious claptrap so long as it is not in my face. Whether its weeklong orgies at the Eleusinian Mysteries, or filling the air with incense during Vasant Panchami, I don't care. Although I think I draw the line at human and animal sacrifice. All of that silliness is fine with me, who has no religious sentiments whatsoever (and as a presentiment, I suspect I'll soon write something about my beliefs).

It's not surprising, given that the more rabid zealots here in the US are trying vigorously to turn us into a Christian nation, and from there into a Pat Boone approved Holy Dictatorship. (Which I am not in the least worried about, as Americans, being the primitve and parnoid lot that we, are sniff tyranny on the most distant breezes, and won't allow anyone that type of control).

So, Happy Harvest. That's fine. Want to set up a harvest display on the lawn, go for it. Just don't get in your neighbor's face if they want to practice the black arts, or honor the world of  the dead, or engage in a pagan ritual as part of their revelry. Okay? Seriously, dont' be pulling that shit. And remember that freedom of religion does mean freedom from religion as well, despite what the creepy authoritarian Republicans say.

I think what I am more worried about is fireworks. Have you noticed that fireworks are starting to crop up for practically every holiday? I'm not sure, but again, given how primitive we Americans are, with our love of blowing shit up and making pretty explosions, you'd think we'd have fireworks every night.

But I am concerned about this. If we are going to have fireworks for every holiday, can we at least make them holiday themed fireworks? You know, green and orange fireworks, pumpkins, witches on brooms and shit for Halloween. Candy canes, Santa and his sleigh, red, green and white fireworks for Christmas. That kind of stuff? Thanks.


  1. I see I miss out on a lot of good material by being a hermit.

    These would be the same christians who are upset by the use of 'happy holidays' during the december season? Oh, I get it. It's OK for them to substitute but no one else. Ya know, if the mother church had not tried to convert everyone on earth by hook or by crook it wouldn't be a problem. All us heathens and pagans would have our holidays and the christians would have...oh wait, they don't have any of their own. They just glommed onto the pagan's fests and renamed them and told all those pagans they were now christians. Guess it didn't work.

  2. Yep. These would be the same christians who, as political activists, attend Constitution Readings, where, like bible class, someone reads the constitution to them, and then tell them what it means.

    they probably say they've read Thomas Paine, but hmm, missed out on the parts like in The Age of Reason, that all churches "appear to me no other than human inventions, set up to terrify and enslave mankind, and monopolize power and profit". You know, christians weren't the only ones to realize the sales and marketing potential of fear.

  3. I had not yet seen the 'Happy Harvest' signs...whatever you want to call it, we Pagans can enjoy a good harvest festival also...

  4. Hey i dont care if its my Cathloc religon or not, Sugar is good!
    I think its a whole lota Politicaly Correct Bullshiiiiiiit to be honest

  5. Mr. Kurman you may have a unusual Ally in myself in regards to Halloween. I am a Christian and I REALLY LIKE Halloween some of my fondest childhood memories come from Halloween. I think a lot of Christians getting the snit because it's the last pagan holiday that they can't co-opted into a Christian holiday, mainly because it's so popular. In regards to "Happy Harvest" however I do have a problem. now that the Halloween decorations are being put up in the attic in what I consider Thanksgiving Decor being put out, there are signs saying happy harvest instead of Happy Thanksgiving and I do have a problem with this,namely you don't have to be a Christian to give thanks for the many blessings that you have gotten over the year or the many fortunate events if you prefer that have happened to you over the course of a year. At least in my little slice of Texas this is what I'm starting to see happy harvest used for and I do kind of have a problem with it your thoughts would be appreciated.

  6. Hi. I love Texas, first off. West Texas specifically. I should retire there because I am that place. Anyway. What I like about Christianity is the heavy dose of epicureanism, the recognition that we have carnal selves, bodies right we we think with our bodies not with our brains. Anyway. If Christmas can start after Thanksgiving, then Halloween should run right up to Christmas. Happy Spooky Christmas Eve to you!