Wednesday, February 1, 2023
Why I Quit Worrying
Friday, January 27, 2023
Pep Talk to the Kids
I had a nightmare last night. It was a dork nightmare. It was a nerd nightmare, where I was in the middle of a Harry Potter wizarding war. I saw a lot gruesome magical acts and tortures around me. I was untouched, almost unnoticed, walking around in the carnage, being a Muggle (which is what I am, and so are you).
The wizarding war took place in the 1940s or 50s I guess, as everyone was wearing bulky long coats and hats. The chief bad wizard and his companions were suddenly in front of me., rudely crowding in, their attention upon the rooftops. I stepped forward and in half a second snapped the chief bad wizard's neck with a grab and a twist, just like on TV.
"Muggle THAT motherfuckers!" I shouted at the other bad witches and wizards right before they magically turned my atoms to dust. I woke up before that part.
Is it worth examing this dream? Not really. I do an off-and-on attempt to lucid dream. Alcohol is bad for that, as well as inhibiting REM sleep. Without alcohol, recall of REM dreams comes back with a vengeance, and that in the form of nightmares. Lots of pee nightmares I am fine with as I don't pee the bed. And as far as I know, I haven't shit the bed for decades. I'll have a dream I shit the bed, and will wake up and search the mattress, but no turds. I always wake up from shit the bed dreams saying "Oh no!"
Shit the bed means to really fuck up bad. I think a worse version is shit in the shower and slip on it, but shit the bed is so concise, so context rich, that it works in any language, in any era. Anyway lucid dreams. The path is through the nightmares as I am closest to awake. It's just a matter of time and patience. It's gonna be a bummer when I do it and it's not the magic bullet. Americans rely overmuch on the quick fix, magic bullet, the technocratic balm, the unicorn rainbow.
Maybe you can't tell, but I am in my manic phase. I suffer from Fragile Kurman Syndrome of the brain.. "What's that? you ask. "What do you got?" I reply.
Kurmans have autism, ADHD, OCD, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, etc., but measured in small amounts. A static measure, cup for cup, is not an apt metaphor, but a helical dynamism will work.
That means I am easily distracted, tending toward a dilletante, a butterfly flitting from topic to topic. As do we all, but I have a focus now. Assume I go another 34 years, I will be 100 (year 2057). If I am 100 years old I am a cyborg mutant along with everyone else.
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Apollo 12 |
Oh shit I wanted to die but then they offer up one thousand ten thiousands of years, well ok. whip it on me.
Wednesday, January 11, 2023
Let's Talk About Masturbation
Thursday, January 5, 2023
The Interminable Dicklessness of the Political Right
Tuesday, December 27, 2022
Internal Monologue
Wednesday, December 21, 2022
Alpha Male
Wednesday, December 14, 2022
10th Anniversary of Sandy Hook Slaughter
I searched my memory hut for 10 years ago, and yes, found two entries on Sandy Hook and American Gun.
My first observation is I have become retarded compared to 55-year-old me. Sure, the sex, drugs rock and roll take a toll, but still a shocking observation of how much smarter I used to be.
Regardless, my thoughts are the same on guns and violence in America as in this essay. If we enforced our laws, there would be a lot less killing. Pussy ass bitch #2A crybabies whining about losing their guns, gungrabbers grabbing out of their scared little bunny paws, sounds like White Grievance.
So shut the fuck up. Guns are killing more kids than cars. Guns don't kill people. Americans do. I fi we have less Americans... I understand. I am in favor of Replacement Theory. You soft white disgusting fat-bodies (like me) versus bold, risk-taking, life-risking stubborn migrants, I take the migrants. I choose brown fat cells over white fat cells. It;'s not like there isn't a need for white fat cells, just not so many.
Say what you will about abortion being the murder of children in relation to gunning them down, as an atheist I should agree. (Abortion cancels a once in a unverse being, assuming I am a aspiritus atheist, which I am. That's horrible, Gunning down a child is cancel fetus horrible? Are they equivalent? No).
Morals of gun deaths > abortions is obvious to me, offensive to you? fuck off. Fuck your feelings or back them up with logic,
Sandy Hook told me a lot about the US of A. Everyone is expendable. Psychotic. We are in danger of fucking it all up, USA, Divine Rights or No? Pick. Choose.