It's a slow news day for me, so just for the hell of it, I googled "stupid asshole". Apparently, stupid assholes are on my subconscious mind lately.
I don't why I chose to surf for that, instead of, say ego-surfing my name. Again. For the hundredth time. (And there is a John Kurman in Kansas City, MO that I may have to kill one of these days, just so that I can be the only John Kurman on the planet. No. I wouldn't do that. Kansas City Johnny is probably pretty safe, for now, and for reasons that will become obvious in the next paragraph).
Well, the very first entry was a "Are you a fucking stupid asshole?" test on OK cupid. My natural inclination is to say "No. No, I am not", but I took the test anyway. I'm happy to report that I'm only 4% fucking stupid asshole, which makes a generally nice guy, and also puts me ahead of the pack, which averages at 10% fucking stupid asshole.
So, I got that going for me.
Next on the google list are two songs entitled "You Stupid Asshole". One by the Angry Samoans, and the other Mudhoney. Mmmm, am I gonna listen to them? Nah. Moving along...
Next, ah, of course, neighbors complain. Stupid Asshole Neighbor abusing Noise Violation on yelp.com. I'd have thought that would be entry number one.
Next, an email complaint addressed to somethingawful.com. Again no big surprises there.
Next, a definition for stupid asshole on urban dictionary. Do we really need that? Perhaps for all the newcomers to our magic land (And welcome to you!), you know, those not so familiar with slang, or English as a Second Language crowd. So, it nice to see public service entries like this.
Next, another song reference to the Angry Samoans. I guess they are angry after all.
Next, and finishing off the first google page of 685,000:
"Kanye West and Cindy Sheehan Are Stupid Assholes", from...
Um, wouldn't think there would be much topical variety there... but I am curious as to how far you can run with it... but no... a quick perusal makes me recommend that you pass on reading. There you go.
Well, not sure where to go with this now. How about I end this with a list of people that I consider stupid assholes. No that would consume too much space. How about a randomly selected stupid asshole? How's that. Kind of in keeping with the thematic content of this journal. And so, reaching into the drum and pulling out a name we get...
Oh, that's a good one. Classic case of evolution in action, as in use-it-or-lose-it. See, this is the end product of what happens when generations of people inherit millions of dollars without any effort or struggle or thought or intentions involved. You end up with an upper class twit.
What a stupid asshole.