Monday, August 1, 2011

Listing To Starboard: Some Predictions

It is a sad state of affairs indeed when the perfect presidential candidate for the Republican field is: Barack Obama.

Sad indeed, but true. The big shift right continues in this country. A moderately conservative centrist like Obama (there has never any question that he was) is now considered a highly dangerous communist socialist liberal commie crypto-muslim cooperator.

As I have said before, we as a nation, have never, ever even remotely been in danger of living under a left-wing dictatorship. A right-wing one, however, is always a possibility. I've reminded those few clear-thinking, or at least non-rigidly thinking, intelligent conservative types that they have a major policing operation on their hands, to keep the nihilistically zealous fanatics from holding the nation hostage. Sadly, it is too late.

Given the most recent farrago of resentments and fist-snaking from the Teatard Taliban, and , ugh, the fact that the repulsive Mitch Mcconnell is holding thumbs-up with a predatory grin on his pink little turtle face can mean only one thing: those of us with real jobs are truly going to fucked up the ass in a new and innovative manner. Oh, not like the old straightforward in-and-out.  We the American people are in for some fancy style ass-fuckings. And it is not a matter of sitting still for it. The Republicans have developed moving-target interactive ass-fucking technologies, with sideways dodging anti-butthole-jinking software, vigorous-circular-motion precision blasting,and fist-felchingly, awesomely thorough depth gauging. Oh, American public, you are in for a treat!

Like, as Thomas Jefferson purportedly said "People get the government they deserve". Of course, Ol' TJ also said "a little rebellion now and then is a good thing", but he said that from the safety of his palatial slave estate, so you can't take someone who sat out the Revolution deflowering mademoiselles in a Paris apartment too seriously, now can you? But anyway, gotta find humor in all of this, right? Right?

Well, here's a little strategyzing, to see how it all plays out. Ready?

The forty year drift to the right, with its concomitant demolishing of pretty much any social assistance programs, has still not engendered the wrath of the people. Despite the fact that any slouching towards a libertarian free-market paradise has had zero empirical reassurances as to its efficacy (and so libertarians doggedly rely upon reasoning from first principles to back up their fucked-in-the-head economic policies), the American people just keep slogging into the shit storm, heads down, lips tightly pressed closed, hoping that, jsut perhaps that dark horizon ahead is a sign that the sideways streams of poo will lessen the further we head into it.

Oh, its' easy to find all the bad news about income inequality and how rich fuckers have prospered on the backs of the middle and working classes.But the one indicator that even the rich parasitic layabouts should care about says that they have fucked themselves as well!!

Their money, which makes more money than they do, could have made more money! Real GDP per capita growth rates, basically flat since 1980, when we were told it is now "morning in America", have, since the advent of 2000 and the reign of Bush The Lesser, tanked severely downwards. Which means even the filthy rich, busy paying their minions to fuck the rest of us, have, through their own greed and shortsightedness, have actually short-changed themselves.

Oh, the irony.

So, and now we have a resolution of this fake budget crisis with a "budget deal" (which means nothing really, as government inaction will result in the repeal of the Bush tax cuts next year, and then the revenue problem starts to alleviate the deficit to manageable self-sustaining levels), which results in cutbacks in federal spending. It is almost certain that, with the loss of spending from the public sector, this will result in a halt to an already dismal GDP growth, and a continuation of our wonderful in-all-but-name economic depression.

Basically, the Republican party has scored a Pyrrhic Victory. They have wasted all of their oxygen and energy on a fake debt crisis in pursuit of their ideological vision of reduced government. They have completely disengaged on every other single conservative issue. Having blown their wad and gone limp on the fake budget crisis, the old boys are done, wiped out, zonked on the mattress with dribble on their chins. Not an attractive sight.

My own highly unscientific polling of conservative leaning and independent types tells me that they are incredibly pissed off at the Republicans right now. True, liberals and liberal leaning types are pissed at Obama and the Democrats, but, uh, they are a lot more forgiving. (That comes with the territory of being a little more tolerant, and thus a little more flexible and empathic, and, paradoxically, dispassionate and reasoning, in their thinking. Republicans have given up completely on using their frontal lobes, and are relying completely on their scared little animal brains. One assumes that fight or flight can be viewed as a kind of reason, but not the particularly sophisticated version of reason that they desperately need over the next few years.

Even better, Republicans now own the economy. If things tank from now until 2016, the onus is on them and any attempt to foist it on Obama and the Democrats will be viewed by an irate public as just the slimiest form of partisan weasel fucking. One wonders if the listing to starboard will continue. If so, I see a lot of IEDs in America's future... and not from the Right, for a change of pace.

Oh, my! If only Mitch knew how far he has shoved his thumb up his own keister, I wonder if he'd be smiling so broadly.

Come to think of, he would.

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