Monday, August 23, 2010

Magpie Nation

As the cynically-manufactured-for-easy-use-by-tiny-brained-wannabe-demagogues non-issue du jour gets extruded out of the daily churn, I can't help but think that we have become a Magpie Nation. 

You know, magpies? Those are the birds whose tiny brains are easily distracted by bright and shiny things. That's what a magpie is. A stupid little bird with a teeny tiny little brain.

We humans seems to be our own version of that. Most of the shiny items we are attracted to are obviously designed to be attractive and distracting. People Magazine. Entertainment Tonight. TMZ.  Celebrity mugshots. Celebrity sex videos. Sports.

If these were a Jeopardy! category it would be "Things That Do Not Tax My Brain", Alex. These are Easy Issues. They require no thought whatsoever. You're either fer it, or you're agin' it. Muslim center in a former Burlington Coat Factory -or- Victory Mosque Built Upon Ground Zero. Seekrit Socialist-Muslim Colored Feller out to deestroy America -or- Black Man Takes Worst Job at Worst Time in America since the last Depression. 

Even potentially serious and thought-provoking issues can be broken down into Magpie Items. 
Global warming. Genetic engineering. Stem cells. Seriously complicated issues get reduced to two words that you can be fer or agin'. Abortion. One word! Fer or Agin'!

Have we really gotten this stupid? Or have we always been this stupid and I'm finally noticing? 


  1. Good question. I think Americans have always been this stupid and the more affluent this country gets the more stupid it's citizens. Maybe the ones who left Europe weren't the ones who chafed for freedom but rather the ones who didn't have what it takes to succeed where they came from.

  2. PS. I hate those word verification things so since I am basically the only one who comments here, get rid of the bastard!

  3. Unfortunately, too many of us are really stupid...I believe it's a watering down of genes...There are many people who are still thinking, but sometimes even they get involved in the mob mentality and go along just for the ride...