"Let All The Poisons Hatch Out"

"Let all the poisons that lurk in the mud hatch out"  Romans 1:18-25

I've decided that the best thing to happen to this country is for all of those bat-shit crazy Teabagger and rabid social conservative Republican candidates to get elected and sent to Congress.

This will serve two purposes:

1) To show the American public the difference between governing by principle, and governing by pragmatism. In other words the letter and the spirit of the law. Granted, a lot of these candidates (Rand Paul, Christine O'Donnell) have toned down their bat-shit craziness to get support from the GOP, but others (Sharron Angle, bless her) have gotten even nuttier, if that's possible. We've already got the likes of Jim Demint, Michelle Malkin, Newt, oh wait, forget that dipshit has-been, others in Congress to show us all how its done, just how fucked up government can get under them. We need a lot more of this. As P.J. O'Rourke said "Republicans believe government doesn't work. Then they get elected and prove it". This is not to say the Democrats can do better, but at least they try to govern, even if they fuck it up most of the time. But Republicans? What did they have, a decade in power? And did a single agency, department, bureau or division disappear? Not one! Lazy, incompetent, stupid-ass motherfuckers! Bring 'em back! Finish the fuck-up already! Take us back to the year 2! Assholes!

2) We, the American public, will finally find out just how many of us are ape-shit insane, how many terminally fucked-in-the-head dipshits actually populate our land. And, if I had my way, deportation proceedings will start immediately depending upon their vote. And then we will proceed to bring in smart, savvy, industrious, clever, brilliant worthy Americans from China, India, Africa, Latin America, Mexico, and the rest of the developing world to take their place.

Why, the collective IQ of the US of A should immediately jump 50 points. And all those useless whiners that do nothing for this country will be sent back to whatever shit-hole in Europe they got kicked out of in the first place. You want to see a true meritocracy? Send 'em back! Those fat, slovenly, pampered, privileged, butter-bunned lard-heads will get the crap kicked out of them!

And so, I actually am looking forward to November, and the government shut-down in 2011. "Vote the Dipshits In!" is my bumper sticker of the moment.

And then... and then... well, I'll worry about that later!

"Money Is Too Important To Be Left To The Rich"

Who said that? I said that, borrowing from Georges Clemenceau. 

Reading through the catalog notes of the Great Exhibition of 1851 (the famous "Crystal Palace" exhibition intended to display the wonders of modern technology from around the world), I found this dismaying and disheartening entry:

"The absence in the United States of those vast accumulations of wealth which favour the expenditure of large sums on articles of mere luxury, and the general distribution of means of procuring the more substantial conveniences of life, impart to the productions of American industry a character distinct from that of many other countries. The expenditure of months or years labour upon a single article, not to increase its intrinsic value, but solely to augment its cost or its estimation as an object of virtu is not common in the United States. On the contrary, both manual and mechanical labour are applied with direct reference to increasing the number or the quantity of articles suited to the wants of a whole people and adapted to promote the enjoyment of that moderate competency which prevails among them"

I consider it a point of pride that, when Queen Victoria toured the American section of the Exhibition, she found it all "certainly not very interesting", given that the everyday items displayed lacked the grandeur of the tapestries, sculptures, and other luxurious items of neighboring sections. We, as a nation, had not yet engaged in a jaded dissipation, in an exhaustion of resources to coddle and support the idle rich. 

Yes, I said support the rich, for it is my view that we Americans who are in the lower 99% wealth bracket labor to support the uppermost 1%.  It is one of the most insidious pieces of propaganda foisted upon the public that the idiot rich are somehow the "producers" in American society. They are the parasites. The parasites are not brown skinned. They are not Hispanic. They are not Negroes. The parasites are pasty white people sailing on yachts and driving foreign cars, and if things keep on going the way they are going, they are going to be eaten soon.

You have only to remind yourselves that the party of the rich, the Republicans, when they occupied the Presidency and held a majority in Congress, crafted TARP. TARP, keep in mind, bailed out the rich. 

The taxpayers monies went to the pay off the banks' creditors  - those who had gambled and lost. Any ordinary citizen would have been, oh so sorry, better luck next time,  out a chunk of change. But the party of the FYIGM (Fuck You I Got Mine) gave the Wall Street bloodsuckers a do-over. I am astounded, simply astounded, that the American public is not more furious at the big banks, the Wall Street parasites, and the Republican party (yes, I know, the Democrats helped tremendously in screwing this particular pooch, but the Republicans were at the wheel. Obama is going to own this mess shortly, if he already doesn't, but credit where credit is due). 

And all this after a decade of pitifully moribund growth, zero job creation, barely incremental income rise for the middle and lower classes, where the upper 1% saw a completely obscene and utterly disgusting fourfold rise in income, the Bush Tax Cuts made them all even richer. AS if that was necessary. All because we are told that somehow, the rich would throw us a sop, and we poor working slobs'd see more jobs, higher income, and new industries as the rich invested in a productive America. And instead Biff and Buffie's trust fund managers (who Mumsie and Papa appointed so that Biff and Buffie wouldn't blow their inheritance on cocaine and Magic Beans) threw it all down one banker's scam-hole after the next. 

And then, AND THEN, the bankers had the gall to go before the Fed and say "Hey, that's a really nice economy you got there. It would be a shame if anything happened to it".

Talk about a massive restribution of wealth. Talk about in the wrong direction. And yet, somehow, the American public is convinced that the wealth is flowing the opposite direction and it is rampant socialism. What. A. Load. Of. Crap.

Example: Take this piece of shit. Here is the fucking moron who provided the philosophical underpinning of supply-side economics - Arthur Laffer. He should be tarred and feathered for that alone. Laffer complains that allowing the Bush Tax Cuts to lapse is nothing more than soaking the rich, and we shall see such a calamity as has not been seen in his lifetime. Ah, newsflash, Artie, the economy (the one you said was doing GRRR-REAT! in 2007) ain't doing so hot, and ain't gonna see much of a difference if the cuts expire. And if you need an example, look at when Reagan raised taxes in the depths of his recession. What happened? Not much. So, Artie, shut the fuck up. The rich are not managing their (formerly our) wealth very well. Time for someone else to take a crack at it.

It would be nice to see all that money do something worthwhile for a change. Like, oh, I don't know, be invested among thrifty, courteous, honest, productive, hard-working small businesses, so that we could all get back to work again?  

The Hidden Persuaders (part 2)

When Vance Packard wrote the book in 1957, he presented his case in a more alarmist tone than was necessary. No fool he, he actually, ironically, stole a page from the playbook of the very manipulators he was critiquing. Obviously, advertisers are not as successful as they present themselves, or as Vance presents them. Otherwise, we'd be making a lot more ridiculous purchases and driving ourselves deeper and deeper into debt. Right? Hey, wait a minute...

Some old department store magnate from the 19th century once said "Half my advertising dollars are wasted. I just don't know which half".

What the advertisers lack in target accuracy they can make up for in saturation. Many may try to ignore these messages, but when you are constantly inundated, when you have no choice but to swim in this sea of stuff, it is hard not to pay attention to it - especially when you trying not to pay attention to it.

Even if you manage this task, it is hard not to be influenced or affected by everyone around you who is paying attention to it. Thus, I hardly ever watch TV, yet I know, through interactions with my TV-watching fellow chimps, at least a cursory knowledge of TV land and its celebrity denizens.

It's as if we swim in a sea of plasmids, those rings of DNA information that bacteria swap with each other, and just can't help but bump into them.

Well, nothing new or insightful here, right? And yet one of the themes I choose to keep on hammering on is, despite our seeming complexity in form and function and behavior, we are still quite primitive creatures, illogical, ruled by animal passions, and predictably irrational. Fear. Anger. Comfort. Pain avoidance. Pleasure seeking. It's as if simple biological rules can describe us, our attributes, our boundaries, and all the little receptors that populate them.

And, of course, all designed to move product, which is what life does. That's metabolism. Move it, convert it, transform it, and survive on the energy of transformation.

And one of the most amazing, magical products, one that is protean, chymerical, modularly brandable, massively adaptable is that creature known as the political candidate...

The Hidden Persuaders

I have limited time today so let me just cut right to the chase. You know those beer commericals where they feature these really obnoxious guys? Frat boy types? Not very smart? With all the eloquence and finesse of bull seals waddling on a beach? Not very attractive? In fact, below average in looks, with pudgy, doughy, unsightly bodies? And possessed of troglodyte moral standards.

In short, don't you just want to punch their faces back into their brains?

And aren't they always surrounded by hot chicks, or at least with cool toys or a superb abode that they are obviously too fucking dumb to have the means to afford?

And these commercials have been in place for decades. And don't you think the advertising guys know this?

Well, of course they do. They are bypassing your logic circuits and tapping right into your reptilian brain. "Look at these assholes" the advertisers say, "They are obviously losers. Life has played a cruel joke upon them. Much worse off than you. And yet these fucking clowns are turning away super hot chicks that want to fuck them. And the difference between them and you is that they are using our product".

Years ago, I read a book called "The Hidden Persuaders" by Vance Packard. Packard recounts how advertisers teamed up wth behavioral psychologists, and tapped into the vast wealth of the subconscious. Packard wrote the book as a cautionary tale in 1957. The advertisers have become far more sophisticated, as now we have neurologists and brain scanning to tap into.

And the advertisers have moved beyond the manufacturing world to package some of the easiest product that ever was concieved - politicians. I'll have more to say about this as time allows.

Demarchy

Also known as sortition, klerostocracy, lottocracy, direct democracy. Basically, the idea is we fill representative government postitions by casting lots, in the same way that citizens are selected for jury duty. Ancient Athens occasionally practiced a form of this. I've toyed with the idea from time to time.

Advantages

• It's fair, equitable, egalitarian, and purely democatic. Everybody gets a chance for power.
• Non-partisan. Allows for more 'third party' influences.
• Corruption is eliminated at the voting stage because there is no voting. No need for funds. No influence of special interest groups through funding.
• Voter apathy, fatigue, and non-participation is eliminated

Disadvantages

• It's fair, equitable, egalitarian, and purely democractic. Every idiot gets a chance for power.
• Allows for more 'third party' influences, e.g whacko minority views
• Corruption is not eliminated at the governing stage. In fact, it may increase due to service apathy or exploitation of power (this is in some sense a moot point).
• No accountability.

The reason I discard demarchy would be the big one, idiots in power. Some would suggest, how can that be any worse that what occurs right now? Oh, believe me, it can get a lot worse. Just wait for November.
So, obviously, I'm interested in it from a systemic standpoint. Is there a system of government that has the least amount problems? Is there a way to make government idiot-proof?
And the answer is "No".
Does this make me anti-government? Oh hell no. I mean, there's no way to make anything idiot-proof. Witness Wall Street. And not just September 2008. 1929. 1907. Basically, a Panic and a Depression every ten to twenty years, thanks to "savvy"business types who are not nearly as smart as they think they are. (And please, spare me the "It was the Guvmint's fault!" line of horseshit. The FACTS, and there are whale's buttload of them, do not support that fucking whiny pseudo-libertarian child's excuse of a rationalization. Grow a pair, already, and take some responsibility for your mess, you fucking executive cocksuckers).
Am I anti-capitalist? Oh, hell no. Capitalism is one of the greatest instruments for social change ever created. And if you think about it, only science has done a better job at creating wealth and prosperity.
What am I against? Stupid people. Stupid people in power.
And getting back to the point, come November, you are going to see a lot of stupid people in power. And come 2011, the nation is going to regret. But you know, people get the government they deserve.
You look at the right, because that's where all the stupid people are going to come from, and you see a fucking mess. Long on anger and short on ideas. Fratricidal, divided, cannibalistic, with spokespeople (Limbaugh, Beck, Palin) who I would not trust to wash themselves with a rag on a stick. Theyd' require adult supervision, because they'd do damage with either the rag or the stick, and I don't trust them to wash themselves.
You got the solid core of the right-of-Hitler xenophobic, socially intolerant, immigrant-bashing Southern redneck dipshit faction that views any form of cooperation or compromise as Treason. (Gotta love the South, with their shootin'shit and blowin'stuff'up reeel'good gun and bomb fetishes. So damn quaint, always fightin' the last century's wars).
You got the oxymoronic Tea Party pinheads. They are all over the place, ranging from childishly selfish well-to-do educated idiots, to complete fucking loons, all of whom want to dismantle the federal government, but oh, pay for our social service and fight our wars for us will ya? With no funds from taxes? Thanks!
Let's not forget to mention the incumbents. Rep. John "Who the fuck put the big SPF-15 'L' on my forehead?" Boehner. The truly, deeply creepy Newt "I cheated on my dying wife but at least I'm not a Nazi like Obama" Gingrich. And good ol' boy Sen. Mitch "Fuck you, I got mine" McConnell. Wheezy old John "Geezer and the Dingbat" McCain. Among many others.
Let's not forget Joe "You Lie" Wilson (Seriously, what is WRONG with South Carolina? I know I've met normal people from there, so...???). Farm subsidy whore Randy "Baby Killer" Neugebauer (sounds like a foreigner to me, check his ID). And the latest, Joe "I will, I swear to God, suck BP's dick right here right now before the cameras" Barton. Not a fucking solid brain among any of 'em. Just watery poo in there.
You think country got fucked up from 2000-2008 with the same kind of folks? Let's see what the new crop of pinheads can do in a year!
Please, before it's too late, find some intelligent, moderate Conservatives. They're hiding in someone's cellar someplace.

"A Volcano of Oil"

I watched the speech our President gave last night on the continuing BP oil gusher nightmare. Though he tried to present the crisis in the best light, I noticed there was a fidgety unease in his demeanor. I think the prez is sitting on something. Just between you and me, I think he should have given us the worst case scenario.

"But, they got it under control, right? He said they'd be recovering 90% of oil soon!"

Well, yes, assuming nothing goes wrong.

I am a firm believer in Murphy's Law: "Whatever can go wrong, will go wrong". Actually, the term "belief" is a pale and shallow descriptor of my conviction in this statement. This goes beyond fact, beyond faith. This is a universal physical principle.

And so, in light of reading through what may be the worst possible scenario, that the well casing is well-and-truly fucked, that oil and sand mixture is rapidly eroding the parts down there like a high pressure sandblaster, that the wellhead and blowout preventer could very well pop right off and the whole monstrous flow turn into a literal volcano of oil, I think we all need to steel ourselves for this eventuality.

It could very well be that the entire oil reservoir, between 2 to 4 billion barrels of oil at minimum, could devastate the Gulf. It would be an American Chernobyl, times ten.

There's no point in planning. Just get your mind ready for it. Just in case.

Hope for the best. Expect the worst.